Blasphemy : The act or offence of speaking sacrilegiously about God or other sacred things.
Now I’m not a devoutly religious person but for a while now, I have wondered what act of mine if ever would be considered blasphemous? And now I know. For a Mancunian, it is and forever will be the appreciation of a Scouse. But when I heard the news of Jamie Carragher retiring a few days ago, I did get a slight lump in my throat. In today’s world when most players would rather want a smouldering WAG and some* moolah, not a lot of men can stand up to the likes of Carra. And having being a witness to the inability of Liverpool to win the league in the past two decades, I do feel for Carragher. So as a tribute to him and many others who graced the shores of England with their wonderful abilities on the ball and equally shitty luck to not have had a Premier League Winners medal around their neck, here is my XI which should have won the league.
*the word ‘some’ here is obviously an understatement.
Quick notes: I have restricted to the Premier League era and players who have played at least 5 seasons in the league. Also inevitably I had to drop a few names to balance the side out (I don’t want them to be over run by the Barca midfield when they play each other in the CL final) The formation being played would be similar to the 3-2-4-1 played out by the Blaugrana in the past few years.
GK: David James
Most premier league appearances until a couple of seasons ago, current record holder of the most number of clean sheets in England, appointed MBE in 2012 and cornrow-swagga that David Beckham only wishes he could have achieved. Yet what is missing from James’s CV is the league title which would have been the jewel crown. But while he is still at it at the age of 42 at Bournemouth, you never know.
CB: Marcel Desailly
One of truly last great Sweepers or Liberos before they became extinct. Desailly won everything there was to win. An honour list which includes two Scudettos and the Champions League with Milan, The big one in ’98 and the Euro in ’00 with France. The imposing defender could never win the league leaving Chelsea just before the opulent Abramovich came in with his roubles but then maybe he thought the league wasnt worth it after all that he had won.
CB: Sami Hyypia
To my pleasure the first of many Liverpudlians on this list, the flying fin was the rock on which many cup winning Liverpool teams were built. A towering figure at 6’5” but strength wasn’t his main attribute. Hyypia was a master at tactically reading the game. 10 cups in 10 years at Liverpool, a good return of 35 goals. What else should he have done? Surely of the finest to have played in the Premier League.
CB: Jamie Carragher
Not the finest tackler of the ball, Not the most imposing figure. But what puts Jamie Carragher apart from other defenders is his willingness to fight, the selfless attitude and the work-rate. His loyalty and honesty has oft been overlooked by supporters who are not singing YNWA. As was the case with Sami, Carra has won a foray of cups but the league has always evaded him, coming as close as a runner-up twice.
CM: Xabi Alonso
One half of the cog-wheel that would drive this fantasy team, Alonso has been ever present for the likes of Liverpool, Real and Spain in the past decade. The vision, the drive and possessing a tenacious tackle, Barba Roja is my favourite player on this list. How I wish we had bought him instead of buying a certain Juan Vernon a couples of seasons before the Spanish waiter brought him to the north-east. Having won everything else he should have, it is a shame he never won the Premier League. Even while I write this, my head is playing that beauty of a goal he scored against Shay Given in 2006 from his own fricking half.
CM: Steven Gerrard
What do I say about this man that has not been said already. Over the years, It has given me both pleasure and pain to see him fall short of winning the title. One of the most complete mid-fielders ever. Also, He and Xabi compliment each other so well. He could have won the the league had he switched to Chelsea under the Special one. But he choose loyalty. What more can a supporter ask for? That is as good to us as is the fourth place to Le Professeur.
LW: David Ginola
If a man knew how to run circles around fullbacks it was Ginola. A part of the ‘Entertainers’ from the Newcastle team in the mid 90s, Ginola came close twice as a runner-up. Let us not forget that he had the looks of a Greek god and hair which would make him the protagonist of any Shampoo advert. Totally worth it!
AMC: Gianfranco Zola
The heir to Maradona at Napoli, Zola is probably the best player to have donned the blue of Chelsea. His ability to do produce magic out of nothing was second to none. Even when in the tightest of spots, he’d find his way out. Not as prolific as many strikers around him, but he had a knack of scoring all the important goals. He left for his native town club Cagliari just weeks before Abramovich came. And it is rumoured that Abra tried to buy the entire then Serie B club to get the man back!
AMC: Paul Gascoigne
As it has been the case with many talented players from time to time, Gazza’s breathtaking trickery and noble footwork was rivalled by his many problems off the pitch. Breaking into the Newcastle team then continuing with Spurs. He left England for Lazio and Rangers before the dawn of the Premier League coming back to England to play for Boro, Everton and Burnley. Gazza’s immense talent was seen as saving light for England taking the three lions to last four of Italia ’90 and Euro ’96 but sadly the man could never win the premier league.
RW: Dan Petrescu
For all the attacking prowess of this team, a player of the likes of Petrescu is needed. Someone who will run his ass off box to box. Attack when on the ball and defend when off it. Petrescu was a dynamo who was a part of the cup winning teams at Chelsea from ’95 to ’00 until falling apart with the manager. He was also named in the PL foreign team of the decade losing to Gary Neville for the final spot. The low-profile workhorse!
CF: Robbie Fowler
An Anfield legend whose finishing was as brilliant as his other on and off the field activities, be it his celebration snorting the line after cocaine allegations or bending over and pointing his butt out to Graeme Le Saux who was rumoured to be gay. Fowler was a controversial figure who was ever present for Liverpool and then Leeds and Manchester City. But 164 premier league goals with no winners medal is a sort of a let down do you think ?
Differ from what I think ? Feel free to cut chop and make changes =)
